By: JD Nullmoniker

“You Asshole!”: Dealing with, and planning for, the emotional fallout of intense play


When your dear friend, lover, or spouse is also the person you regularly beat to tears – or the person who leaves you sobbing – how do you go on being friends/lovers/partners? We’ll talk about giving the relationship aftercare, respecting & recognizing impact on the top, the differing impacts of one-off versus regular scenes, and emotional RACK. We’ll slip in some thoughts on loving and playing with survivors of domestic & sexualized violence. And we’ll share plenty of suggestions, tips, and coping techniques we’ve learned, stolen, and adapted. Most of all, we’ll talk about the inevitability of missteps, and recovering from those missteps through collaborative care rather than assignation of blame. This class is inevitably more awesome with audience participation, so come ready to discuss!